I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
I had to cum in my sink.
Randomize
