So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Randomize
