she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Dicks are not precious.
Randomize
