He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
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