We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
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