For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Randomize
