Say something about gay babies.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
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