i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
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