Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
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