Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
