how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
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