South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Randomize
