Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
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