you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
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