May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
