sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
Randomize