How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
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