So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Randomize
