who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
The Olympian is in my bed
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
