i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
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