he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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