yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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