Small penises have feelings too.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
