When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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