I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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