Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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