I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
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