My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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