Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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