Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Randomize
