Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
this will be a night to untag.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
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