Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
We don't watch enough power rangers
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
Randomize
