There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Randomize
