But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
if i get the "i'm engaged" text one more time, i'm going to shoot myself in the face so my cats won't eat it when i die alone.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
