So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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