Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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