you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
how do flat chested girls get laid?
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
Randomize
