sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
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