I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
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