i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
