True but thats because hes a fetus.
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Randomize
