Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Randomize
