doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
We are all done wearing pants today
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize