woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
i think i have two assholes
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
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