It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
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