lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
