This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
