new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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