I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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