Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
Randomize
